a step at a time

i am officially forced to leave my comfort zone..

mommy and daddy left yesterday. so obviously tears were inevitable. so many times i take for granted their presence.. mommy cooking lunch and dinners..daddy cleaning up the beds after we sleep, nagging me to clean up after myself so i wont mess up the apartment, helping me move my things from unilodge back home or when mom and dad drop me off at uni and come back extremely late to pick me up...i miss them so much..its all kicking in now. im left here with my sister. now its just me and her. and li chen haha sigh...

but amidst all the tough times and sadness there is always a rainbow that God would bring along sooner or later.. thanks to all who prayed! i now have a room in Bruce hall! Although i can't move in yet*quite relieved* coz im so comfortable with my sis and li chen that i dont feel like making new friends hehe but when i get to bruce hall, im forced to make friends..yerrr so scaryyy! haha sigh...i miss claire and cia and est and all you ppl back homeee.....yer....i dun feel like making small talk haha bahs.. oh wells. i shall be on a mission to find a monkey like claire here or at least a milder monkey ahhaha =D sigh....

oh wells, this update is just coz i have 3 hours to kill in the library haha so yea. no pics yet..soon la k? =D haha bye y'all

there's always something to smile about

hi all!

im updating from the land down under. haha im surviving here. i am so so so so so home sick. i am so out of my comfort zone now.. having to go for meet&greet sessions alone just to meet friends...eeeeeeeee i dun like..... i miss my monkey and kbb and estee and everybody! everytime its daytime i think i will be able to get through it but once the sun sets....sigh...im all depressed and sigh....the first day was the worst! sigh...

BUT

there is always something to smile about... like
a new phone
a strengthened relationship with jon
new friends
spiritual growth

there is plenty more so im telling that to myself everyday. i hope 9 months would fly by quick... please pray for me. i have yet to meet a good friend! or a friend for that matter. so yea....

miss you all back home....

lalala

i wonder why am i actually bothering to meet with some ppl...
i should so have took up her suggestion and not bother calling them.
ish!
arghhhhhhhhh.. laazyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

i miss *b*.
i'd so much rather use my time to spend with *b* then frus over who is going who isnt..
on top of that...its like 3 guys and 2 girls....awkward much?!
bahs....

dunnit di..dun wan go diiiiii.....

glass and blood and a happy birthday

this by far is the most eventful cny i've had. hehe...

so here's the story:

I decided to face facts and start packing for my trip to study in aussie.

so i had to take some stuff from the glass cupboard in my study room.

so while my mom slided the glass..it kinda popped out. *it didnt fit properly the glass*

haha

so pop went the glass and pop went my hand up to try and block/stop/i have no clue the glass

hence

A cut finger(s)

A trip to the doctor

A patch of skin glued together with glue

A painful injection

A series of medicine

A very ugly right hand wrapped with white stuffies

A spastic feeling for at least another week

haha

the very ugly looking glass cutted hand

dear * b *:
Happy 20th!

i know its two days late to wish you. im sorry..but you know why i couldn't do it that night. haha

i'll save the lovey dovey and bulu roma will stand stuff for you only..spare you ppl from suffering geli-ness hehe

i love you lots!

Ushering many more new years to come together. =D

denial...

i think i have chose to live in denial these past few months... trying to push all the thoughts and fears of leaving this land i call home.. i don't want to think nor imagine nor talk about any of it. it is as though by not talking the day won't come and that time won't come where i will walk down that dreadful escalator in KLIA.

when will i start to think? i don't know..soon i hope? ketua biri-biri *so long never call u that di..now u really are again* and cgl both also talk to me...scary as it was...the longest trip i ever had to bkt tinggi haha but i'm still scared....

both of you have spoken so much..encouragement and pushing me to do what i need to...i am very thankful to both of you..really... but i don't know where to find that courage to start... i'm really not that strong... i wanna cry.. sigh

God.......
help me...

give me courage and strength to face the struggles ahead...

help me get myself out of this denial

i cannot do this on my own... for your power is made perfect in my weaknesses.

i commit this into Your hands.

in Jesus name

amen.

help me find my way

sniff sniff

u monkey backside......i miss you laarrrrrrrrrrr

come back already!!!!

est and i saw something that resembled you.... it was a sticker on a car that said...... ITCHY BACKSIDE hahahahhaha

monkey you faster come home di la.... dunnit stay so long la...afteerrr freeeeezzzeeee ur backside off...

ish...so boh song larrrrr dun have you when we go out...urghhh.....

oh wells...love love..

would i be able to?

jeng jeng jeng.....i just found out that my awesome-ness exam results will be out on the 23rd of December.... so should i be happy? anxious? excited? bleh? haha i don't know....

Jon just got his results and he did very well...Praise God for that....He truly is a testimony of God's greatness and love and faithfulness..i mean like if u knew him from high school..the results he got then compared to what he gets now..its like....Awesomeeeeee......

but what about me? can i say the same about myself? God brought me through all my internal exams throughout this year...but when finals came...my confidence and faith level just took a free fall and reached rock bottom..every paper seemed Horrible to me...its like i am hoping that i will get enough to get into ANU. thats all im hoping for....and i don't want that coz i wanna do well not just okay... sighhh

what if i don't get the results i want....would i still be able to praise God? would i still be able to choose to bless His name? I pray i would.. coz I know He has greater plans for me and He loves me more than i can ever imagine....

la di da dum........oh welll better enjoy before i find out hehehe....cant wait for the hot springs trip...ipoh trip...pig feast....christmas....ahhhh the joy of holidays... =D